A story for the child waiting for a baby brother or sister
Your child knows a baby is coming. Beyond that they know almost nothing. What it will be like, what changes, whether things will still go a bit the way they go now: nobody has an answer to that, and neither do you.
That not knowing weighs more than it looks. Grown-ups talk about it brightly, everyone asks whether your child is excited yet, and meanwhile they walk around with pleased, worried and cross all mixed together. A story doesn't take that doubt away. What it does do: it gives your child a character who is just as much in the dark, and who is allowed to say so.
The story adapts to your child's age. A four-year-old is waiting for something they can't see, and mostly wants to know where they themselves fit. A ten-year-old hears the grown-up conversations and works out quietly what this is going to cost. Both of them get words that fit their age.
It doesn't end with the birth. It stays in the waiting, because that is where your child is now. It ends with something that is theirs alone in everything that's coming: something made, something chosen, a spot in the house that stays. The doubt about later is allowed to stand right beside it.
And you don't have to get this perfect. You don't have to promise how lovely it will be, because you don't know that either. The story says out loud what is there now, so you can mostly just sit beside your child.
What this story does
- The waiting itself is the story: the bump, the room that's changing, the scan picture on the fridge, the grown-ups talking about it.
- Nobody pretends your child already knows how this will be. Not knowing is allowed to be said out loud.
- Your child gets one thing that is already theirs in what's coming.
- The attention sits in the here and now, not in a promise about later.
How the story grows with your child
Choose your child's age and see how the same theme grows with them, from preschooler to almost-teen.
For a child who is 4-5 years old
Around this age the questions come one after another, and not all of them out loud. Where will everything go, do my toys have to be given away, will I still be the little one. The story lets your child choose something instead of only waiting.
What that looks like
The child gets to pick which cuddly toy is allowed in the new room. They pick two: one that can go there, and one that stays theirs. Mum says both are fine.
For a child who is 6 years old
A six-year-old hears more than you think: the talk at the table, the sentence that wasn't meant for them. Being pleased and not fancying it at all, both at once, feels sneaky at this age. The story lets both be true.
What that looks like
On the sofa the child looks at the scan picture and says they don't think much of it. Dad doesn't laugh at them. 'I don't know how it'll be either,' he says, and they carry on looking together.
For a child who is 7-9 years old
At this age a child does the sums in advance. They have seen at a friend's house what a baby does to a household, and they work out beforehand what they are going to lose. The story takes that sum seriously instead of laughing it off.
What that looks like
The child makes a paper garland for the empty room and halfway through decides they don't feel like it any more. They finish it anyway and write their own name on the back of one letter. Nobody sees that, and that is exactly right.
For a child who is 10-12 years old
A ten- or eleven-year-old often says it's fine and keeps the rest to themselves. What's on their mind is what will be left of their own life: the bedroom, the Saturdays, your attention. The story lets that question stand without smoothing it over.
What that looks like
The child hears mum on the phone saying things at home are going to be quite different. Later they ask what she meant by that, and she says honestly that she doesn't know exactly. That answer goes down better than the easy one.
Frequently asked questions
- Can I make this story while I'm still pregnant?
- That is what it is for. The story is about the waiting and not about the birth, so now is exactly the right moment. You tell us your child's name, their age and how things are at home, and the story is written around that. You read the whole thing free before you order anything.
- My child isn't pleased about it at all. Does the story put that right?
- No. Being pleased is not the happy ending here, and it is not a condition either. Your child is allowed to think it's rubbish, want nothing to do with it and be curious all at the same time, without anyone telling them to look forward to it. What changes by the end isn't the feeling, it's that your child has something of their own.
- We hardly know anything yet: no name, no date, not even whether it's a boy or a girl. Is that a problem?
- You don't need to know. The baby isn't a character in this story: no name, no voice, no personality. It plays out in the weeks before, with your child, in your house, among the things that are already there.
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